Important Man Sues Over Ahi Sandwich

SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- Charles Davenkoop, a Senior Technology Strategy Planning Technologist for Oracle and a resident of San Francisco's new Tech Towers Exclusive Residential Suites, has filed a class action lawsuit against the web site www.makemeasandwichbiotch.com for failure to perform and for disruption of his day.

"I am a busy and important person," Davenkoop said. "I expect things to be a certain way, and when they aren't, I will fight for my rights."

According to the Court papers, Davenkoop was returning to his luxury apartment after a swim and massage at the company gym. While in the private shuttle, Davenkoop logged on to makemeasandwichbiotch and ordered an ahi and brie on a toasted artisan wheat bun, with arugula and a light aioli and a side of chips. The web site promised his sandwich would be hand-delivered to the concierge of his building in a tamper proof, hermetically sealed nitrogen-filled recyclable bag, and waiting for him upon his arrival.

When the shuttle reached the towers, Davenkoop put on his Google Glass with RHFFOV (Remove Homeless from Field of Vision) enabled and entered the lobby. The concierge said that no sandwich had been delivered. Fuming, Davenkoop told the concierge to order him a $5K bottle of Iordanov Vodka, then took the private elevator to his unit where he used a Bluetooth keyboard to log into makemeasandwichbiotch.com.

Davenkoop had just logged in when an IM from the concierge indicated the sandwich had arrived. Davenkoop went downstairs, retrieved the sandwich and his vodka, and returned to his apartment to watch a rerun of Sharknado in 3D on his 100 inch TV.

"Because of makemeasandwichbiotch's gross negligence," said Davenkoop when we contacted him by cell, "I was forced to make two extra trips in the elevator, and I missed approximately three minutes of Sharknado".

In it's response to the complaint, makemeasandwichbiotch said that it promises delivery within 30 minutes and that Davenkoop had arrived at his apartment five minutes early due to light traffic. The company also claims that Davenkoop had Tivo'ed Sharknado and could simply rewind to the beginning and not miss anything.

Tech4Days will keep you posted on the outcome of this case.